With all that was going on I could barely get my head wrapped around anything! I could sit here and type away about the mindless stuff going on in my head...I call it "the committee"....anyway, the committee has told me how I am not very organized this week. Really? I knew that. And because I know that, I feel guilty. Ahh you have to love the Committee!!
So I was lead to revisit a bible study I did about 2 years ago. It is by Jen Hatmaker. It is titled Make Over: Revitalizing the Many Roles You Fill-A Modern Girls Bible Study, Refreshingly Unique. I loved it then and I love it now!!!! I love the way she writes. She writes in the "for real" and the "now". I can completely relate to it! What lead me to it was the fact that I am carrying some guilt in my life tonite (see above paragraph for the Committee).
I have decide to let you in on my journey this time. I mean let's be for real for a second...this is like a public journal! I might as well let you in on what I have learned...you might be inspired to get her book. She has tons...this was my first bible study I had done from her. And I just love them!
As I begin week one I chuckle at the Title: Jacked Up! That is exactly how I am feeling tonite! Jacked up! Day one (Today) discussed CHAINS. What goes through your head when you think of Chains? I think of being tied down and not able to move! Unless they are white gold chains adorned with diamonds...oops sorry. Anyway, in her study tonite I read something that really hit home for me. "Some of us have dragged them around for years: Cains of obligation, frustration, compulsion, weariness." Hey if you are a working mom...you get it...if you a mom...you get it...I believe with my WHOLE heart that any woman out there can relate. Single, Married, with or with out kids. WE get bogged down with these chains. I know I do.
She goes on to say, "No one applauds us for the way we mop........Our professional accomplishments are met at the door with 'What's for Dinner' ". I have felt that way too many times. Just this past week alone I have felt it!
I admire the way she pointed out this evening that God understands our frustration. "Just check out any page in the Old Testament for God's frustration." She writes. I realized as I read further that the more I let these chains keep me down there are people in my life that suffer. My family (who I try to take care of), my friends get neglected (because I don't feel like I have enough time) and God gets neglected (because I can get so exhausted that I run through a prayer sometimes like I am reciting a poem). She nailed that on the nose for me.
She ended the day with a great bible comparison. I fell in love with the verse from the New Testament, Phil 4:13, I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. A lot of the scripture I read tonite was from Isaiah 40. But one stuck out.... Isaiah 40:31,But those who hope in the Lord will have renewed strength. Refreshing thought that God linked our Old and New Testaments! God is good!
Tonite I am aware that I am not superwoman and that I need to become more aware of the Committee in my head trying to pull me down by those chains...even if they are white gold and laden with diamonds. Chains that bind are just that! Chains! I am refreshed knowing that I will relearn how to move forward with these thoughts of being Superwoman. Because I am worn out! And I need God's grace to change my mind and heart about some things.
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